This family photo is not what the following poem is all about. This happy band of campers is set to embark on a thoroughly enjoyable outing (including moi, the photographer). Sometimes my bride (see centre) and I are not so lucky; we have been paired with some real doozies . . . and therein lies the tale:
Golf Partners
When my wife and I go golfing,
We enjoy it somewhat more
Playing golf with different people -
Folks we haven’t met before.
Most are friendly, some are chatty,
Some we find a little trying
Like the fellow from McMurray;
He was very good at lying.
On the first hole with his driver
He duck-hooked a brand new Nike.
We were sure it was a goner.
Worth a look? Not very likely.
But the fellow reassured us
He had just the spot in mind;
He sped off to the position
For the ball he swore he’d find.
Jan and I are both just walkers;
We arrived in time to see
Lyin’ Brian there a smilin’
With his ball – an NXT!
Yet another trying pairing,
Later that same golfing season,
Saw us suffer from a fellow
Who failed – but with a reason.
He could drive and pitch and putt the ball
Like any in the biz,
But when he missed or duffed or shanked,
The fault was never his.
He was using borrowed irons,
Or the slope was quite severe,
Or a gust of wind had just come up,
Or he’d had too many beer.
Or he hadn’t seen the bunker,
Read the slope the other way,
Was interrupted by a noise,
When he was set to play.
Or the card must have neglected
To announce the out of bounds
‘Cuz he’d never had such awful shots
In all his many rounds.
But liars and excusers
Quite thankfully are rare;
More often normal, honest folk
Make up the other pair.
When my bride and I go golfing,
We try to have the aim:
“Enjoy the walk, embrace the day.
’Cuz golf is just a game.
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