Posted by: jockmackenzie | April 29, 2009

“Dealing with Dymans” Chapter 1, Part 1

THIS IS MY FIRST ATTEMPT AT A FULL LENGTH NOVEL. (DRAFT COPY AT THE MOMENT) I WILL POST PART OF A CHAPTER EVERY DAY OR SO. HOPE YOU ENJOY IT. IF YOU DO, TELL YOUR FRIENDS.

Click the “start arrow” below to hear the audio of this chapter:

“The” One


Clee almost floated into the coffee shop. The look on his face was as close to ecstasy as Jack could remember seeing. He quickly placed his toast order at the till, asked for a large Cowboy blend coffee, then turned and flashed Jack a grin that would have lit up a mine shaft. He took two, exaggerated, slow-motion giant steps to the counter and plunked himself onto the stool.

“I have met ‘the’ one!” he oozed with a deep and satisfying sigh.

“And hello to you too,” Jack offered.

“Oh, sorry, man. But when cupid strikes, manners sometimes take a back seat.”

“So who is it this time, Clee?”

“Her name is J.J. and what do you mean ‘this time’?”

Jack’s good friend, Cleveland, known affectionately as Clee, was renowned for his on-again-off-too-soon love affairs. His life’s goal, as yet unattained, seemed to be to capture the perfect mate. To all who would listen, Clee expounded upon his heartfelt belief that there is one woman out there for him (for everyone in fact), one woman in the entire world who is meant to be his (and he hers) for eternity. Sadly, it was taking an eternity for Clee to find her.

Trying to hide his cynicism, Jack replied cheerily, “So just who is J.J. Whateverherlastnameis and why are you so certain that she is ‘the’ one?”

“When you know, you just know. I’ll be the first to admit that I’ve loved and lost in the past, that I’ve barked up the wrong tree more often than you can shake a stick. But every dog has his day – and my day was a week ago last Tuesday. I was in the bank salting away some of my hard earned cash when, lo and behold, there she was. Hey, you pays your money and you takes your chance. Right there behind Door Number 3, well, Teller Number 3 was this angel. I looked at her, and I swear, as sure as debt and taxes, she was lookin’ back at me. When our eyes met, it was like being struck by lightning. I kinda smiled and she kinda smiled and then you know what she said?”

Jack was thinking, “What could she have possibly said? ‘At last, the one man in the world who’s the one for me.’ Or ‘Step on over here, you handsome thing. This could be the start of something big.’” Instead, he just opened the door one more time. “I can’t possibly imagine. What did she say?”

“She looked me right in the eye and said, ‘I can help whoever’s next.’ And then she gave me a ‘come hither’ look and I came hither.”

“Whoa! You’ve got to be kidding. That’s what tellers always say. It’s like some boring cliché.”

“Hey man, I didn’t just fall off the turnip truck. I know that that’s what they say. Don’t you get it? She was being totally professional. She said that, that cliché thing. It was how she said it. I guess you had to be there. But at the end of the day, I just knew; we had chemistry. Now I know that you’ve told me I can be as sharp as the back end of a rowboat, but I can feel vibes when the vibes are there. I was as cool as a cucumber, just did my business, made a little small talk about my being in the military for a while although I don’t just recall how that came up, and then I bid a fond farewell and I was out of there like a wisp of smoke. But where there’s smoke there’s fire.”


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