Posted by: jockmackenzie | August 18, 2009

Speaking – Joke Telling #15 (last joke entry – for now)

Never forget a faceAT LAST, 15 ENTRIES OF (I HOPE) SUITABLE JOKES FOR A SPEAKING ACTIVITY IN YOUR MIDDLE SCHOOL CLASSROOM. I WILL TAKE THE FIFTEEN ENTRIES AND MASSAGE THEM (AS WELL AS THE EXPLANATION OF HOW I HAVE EMPLOYED JOKES AS MINI-SPEECHES) INTO SOMETHING SUITABLE FOR YOU TO DOWNLOAD IN ONE CLICK OF A BUTTON. IF THIS PROVES SUCCESSFUL, I’D LOVE TO HEAR ABOUT IT. BEST WISHES.

A teacher went to a new barber shop to get his hair cut. The shop only had one barber but it was nice and clean, had comfy chairs, and good magazines. The barber cut the teacher’s hair, and when he was done, said that his bill was two dollars.

The teacher couldn’t believe his good luck. He had gotten a great haircut – and at an unbelievably great price. He quickly paid the barber but then asked about the low price.

The barber explained, “Well, I don’t really work for the money. I enjoy the looks on people’s faces when they realize what a fantastic deal they’re getting. Besides, lots of my customers show their appreciation in other ways.”

“How do you mean – other ways?” asked the teacher.

The barber continued, “I cut a florist’s hair last Monday, and on Tuesday when I got to work, there were a dozen roses waiting for me when I opened up. I cut a policeman’s hair, and the day after he came in with a dozen doughnuts. The baker was so happy to get an inexpensive haircut that he came back the next day with a dozen freshly-baked cookies.”

The teacher, a quick study as so many teachers are, got the picture. He returned the next day with a dozen of his teaching colleagues – all needing haircuts.

* * *

There was a man whose lucky number was seven. Throughout his life, anything that involved the number 7 had meant good fortune.

The man waited until he was seventy-seven years old – in fact, 77 years, 7 months, and 7 days. He got a copy of the racehorse directory and ran his finger down to the 7th race track on the list. He flew to the track on a jet – a 747.

The man waited until the 7th race of the day. And then with great excitement and anticipation, he placed a bet of $7o,000 dollars on horse Number 7. Coincidentally, the horse’s name was Seven Up and he was running at 77:1 odds.

Can you guess what happened?

He came in seventh.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Categories

%d bloggers like this: